absolutely cynical has become ALIVE. again.

i know not many people pay a visit to my pathetic, lonely blog nowadays, so today i'm going to blog something i only shared with a friend called me.

note, I'm not complaining about charity work.

okay, first of all, I APOLOGISE for my absence during the last fellowship (when was it anyway?). Reason, I was doing community service in Kuantan (in which I felt more useful). That's why I was lost, confused and left out on (not mine) YOUR big day.

I experienced the so-called age gap. Look here guys, I know I'm still stuck in high school, (with all the lousy facilities,) but today marked the end point of my form four journey, and I'm another step closer to being a CAMPUS student.

I grew up, okay.

Dear 'Old people' (you know who)

I know you are older than me. You have attained adequate experience in blah blah blah, and I do not deny your superiority in blarh blarh blarh, nor am I trying to rebel against you.

But, I feel like you are excluding me from everything. Look, one day you will ALL grow OLD and that is the time YOUNG PEOPLE will have to take over, even outshine you until you go blind.

I'm young, inexperienced and lost. I'm young, just because I'm younger than you guys are. I am inexperienced, because of the years I have used to invest in my education, which I thought was my life. Now I have unwrapped myself, ever ready to absorb new things in. Did you notice that?

I'm lost, because you guys treat me like I'm dead.

No, I did not receive updates as requested, or even promised. Maybe it was wrong for me to wait for someone to send me the latest updates. Remember the time I stayed back for the little meeting with four of you?

Come to think of it, that meeting was held for the sake for something-- nothing.

But, I did not go for community service in Kuantan for nothing.

As usual, before I sign off, I admit that I am wrong for harboring such bitter feelings towards you guys since....like, when I was still an immature and irresponsible young kid? Maybe writing this post is a serious mistake too. But nobody's perfect after all.

signed,

Rou En

The absolutely cynical

ps. i will repent for my sins. you?